Overstock.com, you fill my void of boredom.

I got bored and began surfing around overstock.com, and wow did I find some interesting stuff!

ITEM #1, the "Desktop Butt Station Assistant Organizer"

I began to think 'ya know, now that I have my own desk at the museum, I should start getting stuff to decorate it and personalize it to fit my own quirky style. What better way to personalize and organize my stuff than a man sitting on a toilet!'
I am not lying when I say that I actually really want this... just look at it! THAT IS SO COOL! Its ass is magnetic too, so it catches paper clips and stuff like that. I want this. I am a nerd who loves office supplies.

ITEM #2, "The Ex 5-piece Knige Set with Unique Holder"
What chef was so angry after a break-up that they created this little number? Never break a sous chef's heart- they will get back at you. But seriously, how sickeningly adorable is this? A lot, that's how much. I wouldn't mind putting this in my kitchen. Nice convenient, available for knives when I'm cooking, gives my kitchen a little bit of a quirky edge, and it warns any intruders that I may be slightly mental who knows how to handle her cutlery. Love it. I doubt my girlfriend shares the same opinion...

ITEM #3, the "Hug Me Pillow"
Let us have a quick moment of silence for all the sad, lonely people out there.

...

Alright, this is sad. Really really sad. I'm not judging or anything like that, because I can appreciate quality cuddles when I'm napping or sleeping at night just as much as the next person. But I'm not too sure if I would be really comforted by half a torso spooning me from behind.

Seriously... omg. If I woke up to this snuggling up to me I would freak out and chuck it across the room. But really, if you are lonely, or are missing your honey, and it helps you sleep better at night- then go ahead and chuck out the $23.97 plus tax, spray it with some perfume or cologne, and get your fake, creepy cuddle on.

That is all. Happy Shopping! :)